Back to Brum

I am back in my beloved Birmingham. Whilst I should say that I am sad to see my student life end, I must say that it hasn't hit me as of yet. Right now I am having tremendous fun, watching Sci Fi channel, drinking beers and cocktails, watching dvds and being spoilt by ma and pa. Now all I have to do is find a job. I need money to fund my shoe habit, even though it is on hiatus atm, I'm sure it will be back with a vengeance when I get to NYC. I am off at the end of July because me visa is all sorted yipee!! I can not wait.

I had my last night with OSG. Unfortunately it was annoyingly good. He indulged me, he gave me hugs and kisses, he rubbed my back and feet. We laughed and had a fabulous night. He even gave me some emotion and told me how much he was going to miss me. And then I had to leave the next day. How rubbish!!! But he is going to fly to NYC in September so hopefully I can just be his regular holiday hottie.

Anyway, my favourite sister is nosing at her laptop, must dash darlings.

TP. XX

Bye Bye Shoes, Hello McSteamy

I now have twelve pairs of shoes. (discounting flip flops and boots) If I had an emoticon for hysterical out of control sobbing I would use it right about now. The reason for me giving all my shoes to charity (yes charity, some were unworn and I thought that they deserved a good home) is because I am throwing everything that is completely un necessary. 70 pairs of shoes are un necessary. I can't even carry that many shoes to New York, because then where will I put my clothes?? Which I have also had to downsize. It has been a horribly sad downsizing week. But I figure, I can just buy oh so much more in New York. I am only taking my shoes and clothes to NYC. It feels quite liberating not having any junk. As I type the only valuable thing in my room is a computer, which I'm swapping for a laptop before I leave. So I really am stuff free.

Tonight we're having a wine and cheese night. I must admit that it is mighty hard for me to hide my excitement. These are possibly two of my favourite things in the world. And coupled together I feel like all my birthdays, snow days and other fun things have come at once. I will let you know how the different tastes delight my palette.

I have also started watching season three of Grey's Anatomy on the net. It is delightful. I now not only have McDreamy, but McSteamy too!!!! Yes McSteamy gets a job at the hospital. I think these are possibly the only two men in the whole world I would love to have a threesome with who have Mc in the their names. HOT!!!

Anwho I have lots of emotional stuff to blog about tomorrow as it will be my last official night as a student. I am leaving this horrible sad chav forsaken town to go back to my beloved brummie land. However tonight I have wine and cheese so I will be happy!!!

TP XX

Graduation Ball!

So I had it! It was fun and frivolous. But now I somehow feel anti climaxed. (even a word??) All that's left of my four years of being a filthy student is getting drunk and moving out. To be honest, I can not wait to find a job that will fill the gap before I move to New York in August!! I can not wait. I am counting days. OSG asked me to go to his. I helped him pick his clothes and he looked gorgeous, and now he wants me to peel them off... I think I'll make him wait abit longer for me, afterall it will be the last time.

TP xx

P.s. I would leave a pic of me and the flatmates in all our lovelyness but I don't know how.

*Update I did it thanks to Me!! Thats me in my dress.*

So I did a really dumb thing. I locked myself out of my blog because I was stupid. I forgot my log in email address, but after alot of screaming and frustration I managed to get back in. My private detective skills rival no other. I looked at my profile and found my email address. Never will this happen again.

So Wednesday night, we had a nice girlie night out. We went for cocktails. All was well. We decided to frequent our local club as we have never been there before. They wouldn't let me in. I only had university ID and they thought it was fake. The cheek of it!!! A club only ever visited by underage chav girls, and they wouldn't let me because they thought I looked under eighteen!!! I was annoyed. I was more annoyed because I needed a wee. I was even more annoyed because some sixteen years olds in very little clothing strolled in right after me. The moral of the story?? I should definitely get my tits out more often and then I wouldn't have problems.

I also had a huge row with Fat Depressed Housemate. Since the beginning discussions of the graduation ball she has managed to piss unceremoniously on everybody else's happy parade. She moans that she can't wear dresses, she moans that she can't find shoes, she just generally moans. The accumulation of alcohol, pms and my uncomfortable shoes got the better of me. We shouted, she cried, I felt better.

I've just realised how many wee references there are in this post...

TP

A Meme stole off Me

Four words to describe you?

Rebellious, Extravagant, Thoughtful, Loyal (to my friends before you remind me of my cheating nature!!)

Do you bottle it up or let it all hang out?

Depends what it is, If its trivial I'll tell all and sundry, if it is very serious I'll just keep it to my self.

Is the glass half-empty or half-full?

Always half-full.

What music do you listen to when you're feeling down?

Depressing music. It somehow makes me feel better. Or if I'm just abit sad, then some cheesy pop. Girls Aloud usually cheer me up, and they're hot!

If you could nominate an eighth deadly sin, what would it be?

Smoking

Religious, spiritual, humanist or none of the above?

Maybe all three??

Do you ever spend longer than strictly necessary in front of the mirror?

Yes because the mirror is right next to my desk, so I do get an odd glance. And if I'm going out it takes aaaaaages to get ready. But on a day to day basis I'm pretty quick.

When did you last really get angry?

At fat depressed housemate like all the time.

What's your biggest regret?

I live my life without regrets

What are you most proud of?

Completing my degree!! And my resilience and determination.

What's the biggest difference between men and women?

Emotion

If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be?

I wouldn't change anything. I like who I am, without sounding like an utter knob, but I actually do.

What makes you laugh?

A whole host of things, I am always laughing. Usually my friends, my nieces and nephews, my parents on a very regular basis.

When was the last time you cried?

Two days ago, I have pms and am scared my graduation ball dress won't fit my belly on Saturday when I have to wear it.

How do you deal with rejection?

Not very well.

What is your ultimate ambition?

To make my parents extremely proud.

A Filthy Student no more!!

I am no longer a filthy student having just sat my last exam...EVER (well until I do my masters.) But that is not the point!! I am free!! Free from the shackles of university!! All my geeky horror film peers are going out for a drink, but I think I'm going to do something far more fun, I am going to sleep, all day until about 8.pm. And when I get up, I'll eat somat quick and get so drunk I can't speak.

Will let you know my tails of embarrassment tomorrow.

TP. xx

Reflecting

I have no desire to sleep, for the first time in ever. This is strange and perturbing because sleeping is amongst one of my favourite activities. ( I am a filthy student after all) I have been thinking about stuff, OSG. Like how I have evaded emotion for such a long time, and now it is biting me on the ass. I just want him to indulge me, to hold me, to want me all the time. I want him to know that the next time I kiss him it will be our last. I am leaving the city, the country. I desire no baggage. Yet I desire him. Because it is doomed. For the past three years our heavy sexual chemistry has accumulated in the past seven or eight months of..I don't even know what I can call it. But I know that it was good. That I liked the way he made me feel, good and bad. I liked that he reawakened the needy side of me, I liked that he never indulged me. I liked the feeling of jealousy. I liked that I had to work hard for him. But I'm tired of working hard and games now. I think there is only room for one emotionally dead person in any kind of coupling. I think I must be really hard to love if my behaviour is a reflection of his. I like smiling wearily when I think of him. I like leaving this relationship with the perfect fitting end. I like knowing that we are both satisfied. I like hoping that he may one day think about us and smile like I will. I like feeling woundedly fine.