A little moan

Today has been a funny old day. I'm overjoyed about finishing my dissertation and planning a fabulous girlie holiday with my two bestest freunds in the whole wide world. But I just can't seem to shake a feeling of sadness and foreboding about something. I don't know what it is. I feel abit sad. I feel abit trapped. I feel abit left behind by life. I feel let down by some people. I think that's my own fault because I never rely on people in the first place, so by letting myself become reliant I feel shitty. I feel like being a kid again (not the nappy wearing part, just the fun, not paying bills and playing in the garden all day part). I miss some people, but I know that it is probably better I don't speak to them anymore. I have nothing in common with them. Especially the ex boyfriend. Yet we keep talking about getting back together. This makes me sad because I'm not strong enough to tell him its not what I want. I don't want to hurt him or let him down. I'm still pissed off about my date with Joe. Our diaries are clashing so heavily at the minute I think I should just accept that that ship has sailed. Boo Hoo!!! He was hot!!! I am also pissed off that my relationship with OSG has me quaking at the knees. It is no longer Oral Sex. I actually quite like him.


I just fancied a little moan.